Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Difficult Day...

Today has been kind of rough. Emma acts like she wants to eat, starts sucking on her bottle, then stops & falls asleep & stops eating. I take the bottle out of her mouth. She freaks out & wants it again. I put it back in. Repeat. I then tried to replace the bottle with the paci, but that didn't seem to work either. She figured it out. She's a smart one, that kid.
Now, she's sleeping next to me, after having an absolute fit & eating maybe an ounce of milk. Whatever. I guess some days babies just don't eat as much. I'm sure she'll make up for it once she wakes up.
It's hard sometimes because there's nothing I can do for her, yet there's so much I need to do. I had to empty the dishwasher & reload it, so I would be able to pump, so I would be able to feed her. Not to mention the laundry & house cleaning that really need to be done. It's hard to know if I should just keep holding her & trying to help her quit being upset or if I should just let her cry for a little while for my own sanity. The problem is, listening to her cry isn't good for me either. It's hard to know what to do when she's being like that.
I am glad to have a few minutes of silence for the moment. I'm pumping, so really everything I do all day is for her anyway, even indirectly.
We went to the mall with Shelly yesterday who is getting married in less than 4 weeks! (Wow, that's SO SOON!) Emma was horrible the first part of the trip. She is usually such a good shopper, she'll sleep & we'll stop to feed her & she'll eat, & then she'll go back to sleep. Yesterday, she fussed because she had a blow out, so I got to change my first diaper in public yesterday at Macy's - woo-hoo. Then she woke up to eat right after we had finished lunch & we about to go shopping again. So I feed her some & then she falls asleep, so we get going. By the time we're back to shopping, she's woken up & decided she wants to eat more. So I have to feed her again & she falls asleep again. Then repeat. It's really hard to help shop when she keeps wanting to eat all the time, yet doesn't. I'm not sure what her deal is right now. I guess it sounds a lot like today. The day ended up being ok, we got some good shopping done & Shelly bought everything she needed, so that was good. And I bought a new denim skirt & top, so that was exciting.
Anyway, I promised a few pictures from Emma's "photo shoot" on Monday, so here they are!





At least I know she's happy & sweet sometimes! Days like today are just hard :(

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